The World Is Full Of Idiots.

There's this website I've been reading... It's called "notalwaysright.com" and Cashiers or Help Desk people post funny things that have happened to them... To show you how stupid they can be, I'll copy and paste one.

Me: “Hi, how can I help you today?”

Customer: “Yes, I’m looking for a baby Jesus for my nativity scene.”

Me: “I’m sorry ma’am. We’re currently out of baby Jesus.”

Customer: *to husband* “You hear that?! They’re all out of damn baby Jesuses!”

I never actually realised how retarded our world is, and that post is possibly one of the less stupid ones. And they're not just from America either. Italy, Spain, even our own beloved Britain... But I think I've learned enough about retardation from my Friends.. From Bob's hilarious dolphin impression to Heather's general clumsiness.. And not forgetting Devon's lack of Brain Cells. But hey, who doesn't wanna a good laugh everyday?
 
 

Andrew's iLog

Lottery, Charity and Money...

I was bored today, so I started wondering what I would do if I won the lottery... Like the £69 Million one. It would be quite cool.. So I decided to make a list on it.

1. Give at least £200,000 to a local charity.
2. Buy a Kit Car Caterham.
3. Buy a few bits and bobs (New TV, Xbox Games etc)
4. Buy a new Chevrolet Camaro (When I'm old enough)
5. Put the rest in the bank.

That's it. I'm not really big on anything else. I'd continue giving money to charity though. But not the big ones, smaller ones that are doing good with little money. But saying this, actually having the money would be a big temptation and I probably buy lots of stuff I don't need.

I don't really have much else to talk about....... Except that my Cat tried to eat my Computer Mouse a few minutes ago... Even Nature's moved on to the 21st century....

Andrew's iLog

Blah de Blah Blaaaaaaaaah...

Euuugh. If there is one thing I do not like, it is sitting in a small room with no air-conditioning with another 150 or so people, all playing instruments, for just under seven hours. The smell by the end was HORRENDOUS! I mean Eww. Just Ewwww.. But the music was good, I mean, who hasn't wanted to play The Imperial March from the original Star Wars Soundtrack... Pure epicness on a piece of paper... Nothing beats it... My auditions went well-ish. The sight reading for Big Band was slightly hard but I really hope I get in. It would make my year... And the new Youth Choir sounded quite good too... I laughed a bit at the conductor though. She made the funniest facial expressions.

But O.M.G at Doctor Who tonight. I was generally sad about it! How could they do that?! For those who haven't watched it I won't spoil it but O.M.G! Not a good episode for: a) Those who get too emotionally attached. And b) Those who cry a lot. I need a drink now..... Hmmmm.....

Andrew's iLog

Amen to that, brother.

So in a Ying and Yang balance to yesterdays Evolution rant, I'm going to rant about Religion. Not your everyday faithful person, but your extremists.... The people who give other religious people a bad name. I mean who, when I say Muslim, doesn't think of terrorists or bombs? Or when I say Christian, doesn't think of people getting exorcised on street corners? Or if I said Jews, doesn't think Greedy Tax-Collectors? These people give us a bad name. We are not all like them. We're just ordinary people living out our religious little lives. And no offence to the extremists. I'm extremely glad that your so proud about your faith. But could you tone it down slightly? I mean, I think the world can do without mobs of screaming religious protesters for one day, don't you think?

Off the topic of ranting now, and onto something quite different. Today's episode of the One Show. Amy Pond was on it! Well, not Amy Pond, the person who plays Amy Pond who is Karen Gillian. Just so everyone knows, Amy Pond is my favourite Doctor Who assistant.... Of all time. Evar! They also showed a clip of tomorrows episode, so I am totally hyped for that.... Well, I'm now going for a bit of Halo ODST and Rainbow 6: Las Vegas.... Fun times!

Andrew's iLog

Evolution is only real in Pokémon.

Right, here we go. I'm gonna have a rant. As you can see by the Title, it's gonna be about evolution
I do not believe in evolution. Not one bit. At all. The theory that we evolved from fish is ludicrous. For people to say that I was once a fish makes me slightly offended. And it's not all because of my religious beliefs, it goes against everything. I'll make a list.

1. The only thing I share with a fish is a short term memory. Nothing else.
2. And for the fish to even adapt to breathe on land, how did that happen? I mean it couldn't have just wondered up the shore one day and started breathing in air. And then if it grew prone to breathing air underwater, how on earth did it do that?!
3. This also means that the fish had to go through a chromosomal mutation. Carp fish have 104 chromosomes, we have 46. Now, it would have to have lost 58 chromosomes. That fish would never have survived therefore it would never have been able to breed and pass on this freakish fish anomaly.

I do however believe in adaptation, where an animal will slightly change to suit its surroundings. That's more believable as we can see it even in humans. People who lived in hotter, sunnier countries adapted by getting increasingly darker skins so that they would not burn so easily and reduce the risk of skin cancer. But one species cannot change into another. And now onto a reference to Pokémon, each Pokémon "evolves" into another but i think no, it adapts. Take a Charmander. It will evolve into a slightly bigger Charmeleon which is stronger, more capable to fight. It adapted to this. It didn't evolve. If the Fire/Dragon type Charmander turned into a Steel/Water type Sheep, then yes this would be evolution. But it didn't, it turned into a Charmeleon.

(These three rock by the way)

The Big Bang Theory is another matter though, It says no-where in the bible how the Universe was made. Just how the Earth and life on it was created. My theory is that God and Chuck Norris knuckletouched and the pure awesomeness created mass and matter.

So that's my rant.... You should expect a lot more, I have a lot of them. But I'll probably do one on religion tomorrow. To even things out...

                     Andrew's iLog

Blogging, Nagging and Partying.

I have to say, I do like this blogging malarkey.... Is that how you spell it? Anyway, it's quite fun. But I am still really ultra confused about this website. So I decided to blog.... For some strange reason, which I don't know yet. In the past hour or so since I did my last blog though my mother has nagged me 10-20 times about revision, all about stuff I've already done. But i mean, Sheesh, talk about putting the pressure on. Thanks for having so much confidence in me Mum.....

I don't really have much else to blog about. Except for the fact that after Study Leave I am going to need a good party to relax... That or a new Xbox game... Whichever.

I do not understand this thing at all. My last blog was an aesthetic cock-up. Do forgive. Newbie here.

I should get like a Learners Sticker thing for this........ I'm hungry.

iLog Opening.

Gee... What a busy day. Not.

Well, partially, I've been fretting about Exams, Concerts and auditions to The Highland Youth Orchestra this weekend..... So to relieve my stress, I made a blog!! :D I was gonna make a vLog... But I can't compare to Shane Dawson or anyone like that.

(vLogging is way outta my league.)

Today I've mostly just been playing my Pokémon emulator and doing Past-Papers.. Nothing else. Well I did have a nice talk about going crazy with Devon but that's another story... But i am happy about one thing. My Magikarp evolved. After hours of fainting, I have a Gyrados, named Mr Fish. Now as nerdy as that sounds, all non-Pokémon trainers should know that Magikarp is the single most useless Pokémon there ever was... Until Bidoof came along. But anyway, The irony in Mr. Fish is, as I realized a few seconds ago, Mr Fish is a girl. That's right, I have made a transvestite Pokémon. Ah what a tragedy. Oh well. C'est la vie.

I'm starting to hope to make a few good videos on music. My video in the making, Sock Love, is all fine and dandy. Except for the fact that I have no music to go with it, there isn't many songs about socks. I've already made two videos. Neither of which were actually very good. I never seem to be able to make them long enough. My main video type is Stop-Motion and I honestly have neither the imagination for a good plot, or the attention span to take all the photos needed. Maybe one day I might actually make one which is over a minute. Here's hoping.